So, I know that some of you have gone canyoning, slept in tents with goat heads, and so on, but I -- I -- have braved the wilds of downtown Los Angeles.
Oh yes.
Today, I went to the fashion district downtown in search of inexpensive fabric and ribbons to use for decorations at my wedding reception. I've been to the area of the fashion district known as Santee Alley before, and I was as dumbfounded by the spectacle this time as much as last time. Picture this: block upon block of open mini-warehouses selling everything from shoes, to jewelery, to clothes, to fabric and notions, to electronics and perfume, and everything in between. There are people on the corner with carts selling parakeets, lizards, and fish. Live animals. There are vendors standing outside every shop screaming in English, Spanish, and various Asiatic languages. DISPOSABLE CONTACT LENSES!! FIVE DOLLARS A PAIR!!!!
Seriously.
I did, however, get an excellent deal on the fabric. After finding my excellent deal on fabric, I went to a craft and party supply store which blew my mind. Bucket after bucket of plastic tchotchkies. Everything from plastic babies and bottles for baby showers, to tiny doves, cake shaped bottles of bubbles, and more fake flowers than you've ever seen. It was... disturbing, to say the least. I also found several shops which sold myriad enormous tiaras and crowns for both weddings and quincenteras (is that how you spell that?) that were beyond tacky well into the realm of "Oh my lord and biscuits that's hideous!"
The really amazing thing is the sheer number of people and the sheer quantity of STUFF they have for sale down there. EVERYTHING. It's downright scary. There are carts which sell bags of sliced mango and watermelon right next to the carts which sell these hot dogs that are served wrapped in bacon and topped with grilled onions and peppers, jalapenos, salsa, and crema fresca. Yeah. (They smell GREAT, but honestly, I wouldn't touch one with a ten foot pole. I probably gained five pounds just smelling them.)
But I was victorious. I conquered the crowds, the haggling AND the parking structure staircase which smelled STRONGLY of urine. I am an urban adventurer: hear me roar.
FALL
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2 comments:
What? You didn't buy a parakeet???!
And you call yourself an Urban Adventurer...
Dude, for all I knew, they could have been illegal Guatamalen crack parakeets....
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