Baby Bean is Growing

 BabyFruit Ticker

Friday, January 21, 2005

Hmm...

I just found a cat hair in my tea, and the thing about that is, I'm at work, the tea is at work, the tea cup is at work, and the cat is at home, so how did she manage to get her hair into my tea????

HOW??

Whenever Brandon tells people that he's studying for his masters in Biotechnology, the response is almost invariably, "Oh, like, genetics?" To which he responds, "yes... kind of..." and then they want to know what he's going to do with that degree, to which he responds, "Make cats with opposable thumbs."

...

To which I respond, they don't need them, they already run our lives and remind us of this by managing to get their hair in our tea from fifteen miles away.

~~~

On a completely different subject, I've discovered that my drive to and from work is an immensely good brainstorming time. I've taken to driving with the radio off so I can just THINK. This morning, for example, I played out an entire scene from the St. Jude's novel between Bobby and James that I'm actually quite pleased with -- even now that I've got it down on paper.

That makes me feel good, because lately, writing has made me feel rather overwhelmed. I think I'm having a serious case of stage fright. (Or, what would be a better euphamism? Keyboard fright? Computer fright? Typing terror?)

With Sect, I now know that there are literally HUNDREDS of new people reading it over at hpff.com, and that is more than a little daunting. I think that's why I've been having writer's block on it, because I'm afraid it isn't any good any more. It isn't a logical thing -- tons of new people tell me how good it is, and therefore I start to worry that it isn't any good. How does that work?? Yeah, my mind is a scary place.

Also, I'm feeling very nervous about my new collaborative project, because the other girls are so GOOD and I feel very much like the little person suddenly getting a chance to play with the big kids, and it's a little scary. It's so much FUN, I just don't want them to realize suddenly how crap I am and kick me out. ;c) I feel kind of like I'm scribbling with crayon while they write their Pulitzer novels. *sheepish grin* But I'm glad they let me play. =)

Finally, I think I'm feeling a tad overwhelmed because I just sent off a check for $300 to register for the Children's Author's Bootcamp workshop in San Diego in February. This makes it very real. I'm going to go down there and spend a weekend with other writers, and it's going to be sink or swim time. It's going to be use it or lose it, step up to the fire or get out of the kitchen, shake what your mama gave you kind of time. Not that there's any PRESSURE from a workshop they call a "BOOTCAMP," or anything. =) I'm looking forward to it, but I'm a little nervous all the same. My infallible belief in self isn't so infallible any more, not after the whole DGA internship fiasco, and so now I'm a little wary. Every time one part of my brain says, "You could really do this!" another part says very skeptically, "Are you sure?"

This is not -- I swear -- a plea for you all to pat my head and make me feel better, because even if you did, I don't think it would help. It's not a logical thing, and no amount of "Good Lacy, nice Lacy, pretty Lacy," is going to hoist me out of it. (I get plenty of that from the hpff fangirls screaching "OMG! I LUV UR FIC!") This isn't even a poor me pity party, it's just me trying to figure out what these weird "emotion" things bouncing around in my head are and what they're connected to, cause, as I said, not so good with the logic, me. I just needed to vent a bit, and sympathetic ears are all I was looking for here. =)

It's also me trying to say to myself, "SNAP OUT OF IT AND GET WRITING, YOU GOOBER!! THIS STUFF ISN'T GOING TO WRITE ITSELF!!"

=D

*Yeah. Where did all that COME from??? I started this post about cat hair and tea...*

5 comments:

Cali Girl said...

Are you sure it was a cat hair?
'Cuzzz.......

Anonymous said...

Errr... this is Amr from Egypt (surprise!!!?)... crazy fan I must be...
Ummm... you can tell me a lil about you right?
Wish I can be as creative...
That'll be all... for now.
e-mail : ich_bin_amr@hotmail.com
Don't lose that fan...please!!

Lacy: Who Needs a Hat To Sing? said...

Yeah Al, it was cat hair. (???) And who you callin' Cuz, cuz?

Hi Amr. My journal that is more HP centric is on livejournal. Follow the link that says "Lux Aeterna" on the left and you'll find it. That's where I talk about all things fannish.

As for knowing about me... What do you want to know? I'm a pretty normal kind of gal. =)

Mitchell said...

Hmmm,

Mind if I ask, what was the DGA fiasco? I'm applying....

Thanks

Mitchell

Lacy: Who Needs a Hat To Sing? said...

Oh, the Director's Guild internship was Plan A when I moved to So Cal. I made it to the top 30 people, the last stage of interviews, and then I was cut. I didn't have Plan B.

Hence the fiasco. ;)